Being a True Occupier

(Letters to God, Journal 14, Book 1, 2012)

Lord, you are worthy.  What more can I say?  Teach me to pray "large prayers," the ones You want me to pray.  I'm tired of the "old list" with the same people, places and events that have been davening for months into years ad nauseum.  Things are going on down here, Lord.   Hard things.  Sharp things.  Things that spike their poison in our hearts like daggers in the dark.  Unsuspecting, but not totally unaware.  We hear the roaring lion in the bushes while the night cloaks us in winds of change that certainly didn't bring hope. 

I ask for a new dream.  A dream that will encapsulate what you desire, what You hope for, what change You yearn for in us -- in me.  More than I can imagine.  More than I can conceptualize.  Others say they want to do this or that in a big dream.  Maybe the propensity to dream in divine imaginations has diminished into a miniscule, mono-focused microscopic speck, but it's still there.  Blow on it in your laboratory of hearts where strength waxes strong, vision expands into VistaVision with technicolor dreams.  For me, hard; for You, nothing in the complex vast structure of the universe.  I'm still amazed how You can be so involved in everything in so grand a scale, and yet listen to a only little voice here on earth cocooned within her four walls typing away.  Even to listen to my thoughts!  Zowies.  That's amazing.  (And makes me watch my thoughts, thank you.)

But aren't these grand visions supposed to emulate a broadened scope to help humanity?  I think I got it today, God, big time.  I think I saw your wind words splayed in front of me stained by blood-splattered love with Your elegant, masterful script of grace.  It is as vivid as King Belshazzar's feast with the handwriting on the wall, a portent, a warning, yet scripted with lavish love.  We're not used to that.  Judgment and grace mixed up like chicken salad for dinner.  We tend to gravitate to either one or the other.  But yet I live in a very troubled world that is on fire.  Occupiers, so called, want to take over the world and fashion in their own arrogant world vision which has very little, if any, freedom in it, responsibility, morals in a new work totally devoid of "order." 

Our economy, our land, our government, our society is has become corrupt and bankrupt and increasing by the second in a landslide falling into chaos.  You know that.  I need not remind.  But, Lord, I know that in your word there is an answer.  This is Your day of repentance and revival, right in the tent of wickedness that abounds in plenty, ignorance is worn as a mantel with pride and arrogance the adornment of choice. 

Lord, right here.  Right now.  Cause me to see Your ways!  Charge me with purpose, renewed resolve to accomplish by direct command, divine edicts from Your throne pinpointedly your desires, your will, your heart's passion for others that all can see who You truly are in wonder, beauty and the myriad colors of grace.  Your beauty is astounding.  Perfect.  Multi-faceted in splendor and wonder.  Maybe that's vision enough.

Yet Your people -- the ones using Your name, the holy name above all names -- do not fear and reverence You for who You are, have been, and will be.  The here and now is skewed by those who do not treasure the lessons from those who have gone before.  There's been warning signs before, harbingers of impending doom were sounded with trumpet clarity, silencing the social complacency and religious bigotry stamped with the seal of wickedness with sword-sharp truth.   They are sounding once again right now.  Lord, will we enter or with a scoff and smirk of defiant arrogance turn away -- yet again?  I know you have set expiration dates on complacency, a termination hour of continual rebuffed invitations to embrace Your truth. 

You know, the freeway signs?  Signs to desired destinations direct one to their exit:  5 miles, 2 miles, 1 mile, this ramp only, last chance.  Oh, God!  We can either heed the signs of the times or we can continue with the crowds and face a far worse place than You ever desired for us.  Some may say I sound fatalistic.  I'd say, "Sure, you bet."  They might even say this is just trying to write something sensational by some kooky woman with a bent.  I'd have to say a resounding no to that.  Truth has a death knell but in the midst of it is also a peal of joy.  A two-edged sword. 

So many think You're out to get them, Father.  How sad.  It's just straight-up facts that the signs are all around.  You sent them.  They're not coincidence or "just life," but they're warnings You Yourself sent in your graciousness to hold out a hand of love.  Amazing.  The signs heeded bring safety; ignoring them is suicidal.  You are a royal being, a royal King who will not be denied.  Your ways are final.  I choose life, Lord.  Life and death, blessing and cursing; Lord, I choose You.  You're NEVER a dictator.  Your kingdom is love.

But Your love is so red hot!  Searing!  Burn out the selfishness, self-righteousness, and carnal nature of man, Lord.  Transform them into a royal son/daughter so filled with You that they are magnets of grace living in shoes of peace showing that through Your joy we're able to walk through any global crisis, criticism of not being "politically correct" and stand in righteousness with the power and might of heaven.  Golden gladiators of grace.

quo and head-in-the-sand mentalities and bring sorrow.  Yet, the time of our lies is now.  Right this minute. 

I know what my vision is clearly now.  Crystal.  I cry out in repentance.  I know that no elected official can turn this nation around.  No big shot, no charismatic one-minute wonder.  Nobody can "fix it."  You were abundantly clear in 2 Chron. 7:14.  And I know it's not for everybody else I can think of; it's for me.  I think I've made up my own version:  If my people called by my name (those in covenant with you as in a marriage) will humble themselves and pray ... crave and go after You with crazy passion, stop the idiotic carnal strivings emulating the world and all its desires -- then I KNOW you will do what you said you would do:  hear from heaven and heal our land, our nation, our beloved United States of America.  It will be healed.  That's the answer.  Not the polling booth (yet, I thank you for that God-given privilege), not community awareness, programs of how we can go green, not a new governmental bailout (which is really usury and theft, freebies without responsibility), or a new pastor and seven new church programs that are a sure-fire crowd pleaser.

It's to be on our knees -- my knees, Father.  I pray that others will join in on the call to repentance making 2012 the year of pleas on the knees.  Praying for our country, for the church, His Body, for ourselves corporately and individually that we may be healed inside, outside, our land, and the world.  The sign, the call, the clarion sound is being held.  I hear it.  I have chosen to walk in Your paths, Lord.

I don't want to be challenged that I am tone-deaf.  I will accept Your hand outstretched in love.  I know I'll be right on key.